


lost in the storm of hurt and loneliness (help me find my way back home)

by dogsbreath



Series: danny and steve and the strays they picked up along the way [1]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Caring Danny "Danno" Williams, Family Feels, Family of Choice, Hurt/Comfort, Protective Danny "Danno" Williams, Protective Steve McGarrett, Worried Steve McGarrett, juniors dad was a piece of shit ok, steve and danny acting as parents to junior
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2021-01-04 01:53:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21189602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dogsbreath/pseuds/dogsbreath
Summary: or, four times junior needs better parents and the one time steve and danny become those parents





	lost in the storm of hurt and loneliness (help me find my way back home)

**Author's Note:**

> so the (first person—third person—first person) symbolizes juniors fight with what his heart really wants

you’re not my son, is still echoing in his head by the time he gets back to steve and dannys (home—maybe to them, junior doesn’t even know if it would be better to move out—i don’t want to). he hasn’t cried since the hearing last night, and he really doesn’t want to breakdown with steve and danny in the next room. 

eddie gives him away by running to him, and the small push he gives juniors legs is enough to send him back against the door and onto the floor. eddie whines, and suddenly all junior can remember is his sisters old dog and he has to squeeze his eyes shut at the thought of maya. 

“junes? you home?” danny calls. 

junior absolutely doesn’t (does) run after that. he pushes himself up off the floor and runs, leaving his keys on the ground and shutting himself up in (his— no—yes) the guest room. he stays there. 

————

the next morning when steve casually lays a hand on his shoulder as he’s talking to danny, he flinches. he doesn’t want to think about why, because he’s done it a thousand times before and junior has never flinched then. except this time he does, and it stops steve and danny in their tracks, and junior does his best to make himself seem small under their gazes, and steadfastly continues to eat his cereal in silence. 

“junes, you okay?” danny asks. 

no, junior wants to say, no i’m not. help, he wants to say, fix me, please. instead, he nods. 

————

it’s a few days later and junior still hasn’t told anyone what happened. it’s a few days later when charlie is at the house and he skins his knee and danny and steve drop everything at the sound of his crying. and junior aches, a longing for it so sharp he has to excuse himself from where he was at the table with nahele. up in his room, junior lets out a breath, trying to remember the last time his parents dropped what they were doing to see him when he was injured. he fails. 

it’s a few days later and junior is still broken and tearing at the seams. 

————

he’s doing paperwork on dannys office couch a week later when steve enters, and he looks at junior. “there’s someone here who wants to see you.” 

danny got up and followed steve out, and left junior face to face with the person who killed his sister. He sees tani take a step towards dannys office when she notices and he shakes his head. she listens. 

“i want to thank you. for forgiving me. i wouldn’t have in your shoes. i’m sorry about what happened.” he says. he’s sorry and all junior can do is manage a nod and a “i think it’s best if you leave. i’ve forgiven you, but i don’t want to see you.” 

he leaves and junior is left wanting to scream and cry and grieve the way he never did growing up. he leaves too, and he ignores tani’s whispered protests and hopes she won’t break the promise she made to not tell steve. 

his paperwork never gets done. 

————

the next case they get is the homicide of the guy who killed his sister. junior knows who did it, knows what ballistics will tell them. 

he goes there before ballistics get back and he’s sitting on the couch, blackout drunk at two in the afternoon. “you killed him,” junior states. 

“i did.” he slurs. junior hears the camaro before he sees it. “why,” junior asks, as tani opens the door. 

he stands, pointing his finger are junior with a glare, “i did what you could’ve done. i punished him for what he took. no son of mine would’ve let him walk.”

junior just stares as tani handcuffs him. it’s been a month, he tells himself, he should be over it. it still hurts more than the day he was disowned. his mother passes him in handcuffs too (accomplice, tani would tell him later). she doesn’t look at him. 

“junes,” steve calls quietly. junior turns and starts running. he runs until he’s out of breath and breathing hard and crying and he runs, his legs taking him to the one place he ever felt loved, he runs home. 

when the camaro pulls up an hour later he’s sitting on the doorstep and he’s crying and sweaty. steve sits on his right and danny sits on his left. “he told us everything.” steve says. 

“why didn’t you tell us, junes?” danny asks, and junior can only shake his head, “wasn’t your problem, im not your problem.” 

his brain screams don’t believe me, take me in, don’t leave, love me, while he speaks. 

junior makes to stand, to leave— he’s not even sure why he came back here anyway— but steve grabs his wrist and pulls him back down. he hugs him. he hugs him and it’s the same hugs he’s seen steve give grace and nahele and charlie and junior breaks. his tears wet steves shirt, and he doesn’t get to try and speak because danny has his arm around his shoulder and his head is resting on juniors shoulder and junior shakes. 

“what are you doing?” he asks. 

“hugging our kid,” steve answers. 

junior cried even harder, but he doesn’t feel guilty for staining steves shirt afterward.


End file.
